Back to normal?

Well it's been a month since I finished radiation and things are getting pretty much back to normal. But it's a new normal, there is the normal before the cancer and the new normal after the cancer. I'm taking medication daily and I now have scars, physical and otherwise, that were not there before, my skin is still healing, it's a funny color and with my shirt off I can see the square area where the radiation went and I'm still peeling. It's almost like a sunburn peel but a little different.

I've gone back to working at the store lots of hours, just like I would any other holiday. I still can tire a little more easily than normal. I get bursts of energy where I feel like I could climb a mountain, the other day I cleared off my entire kitchen counters and wipped them down then I scrapped the grout of the tile and though, hey when I'm done I'll go do this in the bathroom. Well that did not happen, once I was done in the kitchen I was exhausted. LOL I'm trying to get back to cooking on my nights off and sometimes when I do I wind up leaving the dishes until the next day because I'm too tired to do them at night.

I'm a changed person in many ways, none that I think people will really notice or see on the outside but I can feel it.

I did see my oncologist a week ago and he said I'm doing great. I have to keep taking my pills and have a mammogram once year and be very aware of any changes to my breasts. He was on my for about 20 minutes about my weight, which I expected, but didn't care to hear. It's not like I think I'm thin. I know I'm fat, I know it's not good, I know it needs to be changed. I want to change it I really do, and I will when I'm ready. I'm looking into getting some walking shoes and starting there, I need a really good pair so I'll wait until after Christmas when I have the extra money for me. I've found a really good pair of New Balance that I am going to get me, they are actually running shoes but I've been told that's a good thing to get.

It's actually more expensive to eat healthy than it is to eat badly... LOL I mean have you seen the price of fruits and veggies? Plus I'm not a big veggie fan so that is going to be a hard one to get in on a daily basis. But I will get it done. I know I can. After what I've been through, I can do ANYTHING!